Sunday, September 25, 2011

Jesus Camp

Disappointment arouse with disgusting smell from a deep sewage pipe inside my heart. As a person who believes in god I have seen and experienced several Religious Camps in my life. However, I have never seen extreme Jesus Camps as depicted in this documentary. In Jesus camp, the children and the family members were misled by apparently zealous Christian leaders. Incorporating wrong means and wrong directions in teaching religious tenets, the leaders were proud of their accomplishments in Jesus Camp while several experts criticized harshly on the curriculum and the status quo of the Jesus Camp. Yes, those who participated in Jesus Camp claim that they “met” the true god in their hearts. However, the documentary implies that these did not meet true God, but met quasi-God in their hearts.

Who truly believes in God? This is the question mankind has always faced. As a Christian, I have gone to church for several years. Although I do not know that much about the teachings of God, I discovered evidence in my life: We cannot know the true purpose of God. The leaders of the Jesus Camp failed to perceive the evident fact. They believed that it was they who represent the name of God. They also rationalize the behavior they make in Jesus Camp, claiming that the world will end soon and that this generation is the “blessed” generation which will save the world. However, God is the only one who will make choice. The wisest behavior we can make is to wait for God’s decision, not to predict nor misuse the name and sayings of God. Maybe this is the point Jesus Camp must consider again.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Having Dinner with Amadeus Mozart


Wolfgang Mozart is one of the most famous composers in classical music. He is also known as the genius of music. At the age of three, he was able to play several notes on the Klavier, the prior form of pianoforte. At the age of five, he composed his first musical piece. He subsequently composed several variations, sonatas, dance songs, and ceremonial pieces. He held concerts with his family in Austria, France, and Prussia. He composed his major works from 1786 to 1791. He composed more than 600 musical pieces in his life. Although he died early, his pieces are commented by critics as one of the most genuine and beautiful classical pieces in history. His famous pieces include "Symphony no.41", "Requiem", "Magic Flute", and "The Marriage of Figaro".Yes, everyone knows that Mozart the composer already deceased more than 200 years ago. I also could not imagine that I would personally meet Mozart, the greatest musician in history. However, there was only one way to meet Mozart: through my dream.

Enjoying conversation and meeting with my relatives after Chuseok, I fell into bed and wandered between the reality and the dream. There, on the same bed I fell into, laid the musician I wanted to meet. He was extremely ill. He could not open his eyes properly, nor could he sit up straight. Although he was a dying musician, I wanted to ask him so many things because I wanted to hear Mozart’s true inner voice. A person’s true character is revealed when he is in desperate situation. In his death bed Mozart might reveal some of the mysteries he had hold for hundreds of years. Unfortunately, the only thing he could do was to lie down comfortably as he could, to write down notes after notes on a sheet of paper, and, the most basic of all, to speak and eat meals. When I recognized him, he was having his own dinner: porridge served with a malodorous slice of onion and lettuce. Interestingly, there were one served for Mozart, and another served for me. (perhaps, because it was a dream) The room was terribly dark; nothing was to be seen. Only I, Mozart and two plates of dinner illuminated in the darkness by a small candle between me and Mozart. Only silence.

Me: Excuse me. I am very sorry to interrupt but, are you Amadeus Mozart?

Mozart (abbreviated as M from later on): Ja, ich bin, ah-choo (he sneezed), Mozart.

Me: Ooops. I almost forgot that you spoke German. Hold on a second. I will give you the automatic translator so that we can communicate each other. (I placed two automatic translators, which somehow appeared in my hands, one on my ear and the other on Mozart’s ear) That’s it. Now, I am very sorry to interrupt but, are you the famous composer, Amadeus Mozart?

M: Not famous, but I am indeed, (coughing slightly), Amadeus Mozart. (He returned to his porridge without any reply.)

Me: Sir, I want to ask you some…

M: Please do not ask me questions. I am too tired to speak any word to you. How dare you (coughing) ask something to this filthy, failed, and untalented musician?

Me: Sir, I did not want to hurt your feelings. I just wanted to listen to your true thoughts which you were not able to express to others. This conversation will become an opportunity for you to tell anything that you wanted to reveal in your entire life. You will not have another opportunity to reveal yourself to others. So please, would you answer to my questions?

M: Hmm.. I guess you are right. But I do not want you to ask “offensive” questions. (coughing slightly) In that case, I will not answer to the question. Or, I can become very, very angry.

Me: Okay. (Wow.. It is much tougher than I thought..) I understand your point. The first question: I just realized that you are still composing music. Although you are extremely ill, you are still fervently drawing notes and melodies on the sheet of paper. I also heard that you played the Klavier several times even when you were sick. Why are you keep playing, enjoying, and even composing music even though you are under severe situations?

M: Well, this is my job. I became a composer, a musician, and a critic in classical music. (coughing again) If you truly have devotion in your job, you cannot give up or abandon your career. I love music. I love the melodies that mingle inside my ears. Ah-chooh.(he sneezed) I love the songs, the rhymes, and the tones the nature and the mankind create. I cannot resist letting go the notes I have in mind. Someday I believe the notes I once wrote down the paper can become another inspiration or another melody in the opera, the sonata, or the oratorio. Yes, I know that my strength has weakened, and I know clearly (coughing) that I will die couple of days later. However, I want to embrace music all my heart. Maybe this is the time that I can truly devote myself into music. Day by day I discover new themes, techniques, and emotions throughout my sketches. (coughing again) Sometimes the sketches are frightening, gloomy, and dark. Sometimes they are joyful, enlightening, and wonderful. I always gain life and passion by scribbling down what I have in mind. Ah-chooh (he sneezed again) By the way, do you love music?

Me: Sure I do. I enjoy playing the piano, which is the developed version of Klavier. I always feel warm-hearted when I listen or play your compositions. I have also won several competitions. Whenever I play the piano, I always sing the melodies of the piece. Once I indulged into music so much that I could not remember what I performed during the performance or the concert.

M: I can see that you have some taste in music. However, I am not quite sure if you have devotion in music. If you had devotion in music, you would have kept yourself from indulging into music. (coughing) A musician does not lose his minds or emotions during the performance: a musician stands in an objective perspective. He is an observer who carefully views the actions and the emotions of the composer. (coughing again) After the observation the musician expresses his own impression and feeling into the piece. However, the musician should repress the feelings in his performance because the audience might be overwhelmed or uncomfortable with his expressions. (coughing) You might have noticed that every musicians play the same piece in different styles; but they all imply, not explode, their emotions throughout performances. I would say that the one who effectively controlled but tacitly expressed his feelings about the piece is the most genuine musician in the world.

Me: Then, do you mean that I should limit my expression while playing the piano?

M: Not limiting your expression: (coughing again) implying your expression would be a better explanation. The audience already knows your feelings even though you imply them. (eating a spoonful of porridge with disgusted facial expression) Do not try to force yourself to indulge into music. The audience already knows.

Me: Thank you for your advice, Sir. (I ate a spoonful of porridge, also disgusted at its taste) I always wondered why my performance did not bring attention or inspiration to other people. I think I overwhelmed the audience, who did not feel sympathy or affection after my performance. I should imply, rather than explode, my emotion on my next performance.

M: A very valuable discovery, young man. (patting my back) Keep up your good passion.

Me: Thank you, Sir. (Trying another spoonful of porridge) Sir, I once said that I always feel warm-hearted when I listened to your compositions. However, some people say that they feel a trace of disappointment, a tragedy happening under the veil of beautiful and magnificent magic. They say that your compositions are at once wonderful and fragile. Why do you think this characteristic happens throughout your piece?

M: Unfortunately, I do not know. (coughing slightly) As a matter of fact, I have never felt a sense of melancholy emotion throughout my piece. Hmm… Can you elaborate on the feeling you mentioned?

Me: Well, they say that your piece is like a sorrowful widow who wants to overcome her hardships. Although the melodies are beautiful at first glance, the sorrow and sadness intermingles with the melodies. Is there any personal trauma or disappointment you always had when you composed music? Maybe the disappointing experience can be the source.

M: Sorry, I do not know the answer to this question. I have never received this response from anyone. Ah-Choo. (he sneezed) The only projection I can make is “isolation”. Although I was satisfied with my opera, sonata, oratorio, symphonies, and many other compositions, the Vienna aristocrats did not have much interest at my revolutionary and bold attempts. Yes, there were times when I enjoyed my success. (coughing) However, I often failed to earn high recognition from the public. Whenever I wrote music piece that satisfied my heart, I was disappointed by the reaction from the crowd. (coughing again) I think the sense of isolation and frustration intermingled into my compositions unconsciously.

Silently, we finished the porridge.

Me: I see. Actually I also felt that your compositions were slightly contradictory; although you portray the most beautiful melodies, you also embed sorrowfulness and wistfulness in the tone. However, you have overcome hardships and have composed more than 600 pieces in 40 years. This is one of the remarkable records in history, I believe. When you composed music, from where did you gain inspiration?

M: Very good question. I received inspiration from many sources. (coughing slightly) One of the sources was folk songs. The tunes of the songs are very common among many citizens. Based on the tunes, I created several variations or sonatas. (deep in thought for a while) Do you know the Klavier variation “Ah vous dirai-je Maman”?

Me: Sorry?

M: “Ah vous dirai-je Maman”, or “I give this song to my mother.”

Me: Do you mean the 12 variations you composed for your mother? Yes, I know that variation. The piece has been used for other songs after you deceased, such as “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star” or “Alphabet Song”.

M: Really? Anyway, did you know that the melodies I used in the variation were (coughing again) actually from the melodies of a French folk song?

Me: No, I didn’t know that.

M: Well, some of my piano variations and sonatas partly originate from folk songs. A lot of audience enjoyed listening to the different version of folk songs. Ah-Chooh (sneezing again) Some of the songs were made from requests. Many aristocrats or lords asked me to compose several pieces. You might realize that for 3 years I composed mostly masquerade music or dance music. (coughing slightly) That was the age when I earned the most economic success in my life. In composing dance music, I often took out a picnic or walk around the park nearby. (coughing slightly) Observing the tones of nature, every day I discovered new rhymes, rhythms, and melodies to incorporate into my songs. Nature was the main source of my inspiration. Nature always changes. Everyday you go out for a walk, everyday you realize little but substantial changes. But there were some times when I did not want to go out because the weather was bad or because I had a severe disease. In these situations when I got bored, I used “probability” into my composition.

Me: Sorry? Did you say “probability”?

M: Yes. Is there anything wrong?

Me: How could you compose music from “probability”?

M: I used a pair of dice to compose Minuet, a form of dance song popularized during 17th century to 18th century. (coughing slightly) The format of Minuet is very simple: you need 16 measures and unique melodies and chords. You set 11 different samples for each measure, and give each sample a number from 1 to 11. (choughing again) Then, you roll a pair of dice. Suppose that you roll the dice for the first time. If the sum of the number from the pair of dice indicates 4, you set the sample number 4 as a song. Continuing this process for 16 times, you will be able to compose hundreds of Minuet out of one rule: “probability”. (sneezing again) I often introduced this method to my friends who wanted to learn how to compose Minuet with enthusiasm and enjoyment. (coughing again) However, they gave up after they had tried two to three times, saying that the method was too complicated for them.

Me: I think the procedure is truly marvelous! (If you want to try this method, go to http://sunsite.univie.ac.at/Mozart/dice/collaborate.cgi?tables=no) I have never heard of musician composing his music based on probability. Sir, I have another question. I believe that your greatest work of all is Requiem. Almost everyone wants to know how and why you composed Requiem. From where did you receive inspiration when you composed Requiem?

M: (with firm determination)I cannot answer that question.

Me: Why? It is one of your masterpieces.

M: I cannot give any hint about that question.

Me: Didn’t you tell some of the details about Requiem to one of your students? I heard that you dictated one of the passages to your student Sussmayr personally.

M: That is not true. I have never told anyone about the piece. (in a defiant voice) I have made a contract with a person who asked me to compose the piece.

Me: Then why don’t you tell me before you…

M: Never! (His face reddening) How dare you, you stranger, ask that question in front of my face? (he coughed madly)

Me: (bewildered, quivering slightly) Sorry to interrupt you, Sir. I am very sorry.

Silence for a while.

Me: How are your family members?

M: They are fine. I feel sorry for them, especially for my wife. She was one of the brightest women I have ever seen. Constanze Mozart. (coughing slightly) We loved each other very much. She was kind and gentle, but sometimes bossy. She often reprimanded me for not writing down a single note on the paper for several hours. However, I always remember her smile whenever I am under hard situation. (coughing slightly) She supported my decisions and contributions. She always helped me get through financial hardships. Although many people did not know, she had an extraordinary sense in music; she advised me a lot in composing new pieces. (coughing slightly) For instance, when I had difficulty finishing the last movement of the Symphony no.41, she brought up several techniques from Bach's Prelude and Fugue, giving me vital inspiration on how to end the pain-staking but beautiful symphony. In addition, my wife advised me to incorporate works of Bach and Handel into the opera, (coughing slightly) creating one of the inspiring opera I have ever composed: the Magic Flute. There are some tales that I mimicked the voice of my wife into the main verse of the Magic Flute, (coughing slightly) but those tales are false. My children are all fine. I am very happy to see my little Franz; he is only 5 months old now. Karl is also growing well. He is seven-years-old. Ah-Chooh (sneezing) I think Karl has more devotion in music than I had when I was his age. I hope my two sons to grow up as renown musicians in the 19th century.

Me: I hope so, too. (Unfortunately, I have never heard any about Mozart’s two sons before this conversation.) Sir, I want to show you something. After you died, many people loved your songs and compositions. Even after 200 years, every people celebrate your music, regarding you as the genius of classical music. There is even a movie about your life: “Amadeus”. Would you like to see the movie and comment about it?

M: Very astonishing. Yes, I would like to.

Suddenly a screen appears in front of the beds. I and Mozart watch the movie for two and a half hours. Mozart’s facial expressions changes from gloominess to happiness.

Me: How do you feel?

M: I am very impressed on how people thought about me. I enjoyed the movie overall. I am very happy that my performances are thought as great pieces even in the future. (coughing slightly) However, there are some points that I want to comment at. The main plot of the story, which is the tension between Antonio Salieri and me, is not quite true. Salieri and I were friends and colleges. (coughing again) We enjoyed and approved each other’s performances. When I successfully ended the opera Magic Flute in front of the audience, Salieri stood up and shouted “Bravo! Bravo!” I also enjoyed the compositions from Salieri, which were both tremendous and elaborate. Ah-Chooh (sneezing again) Both of us liked each other’s musical techniques and devotions. The other thing was on how much I had succeeded during the 18th century. Yes, I did not earn much success from the public. However, some aristocrats enjoyed my compositions. (coughing slightly) My opera Don Giovanni was not performed for only 5 days. (in a proud voice) Actually, I performed it for several weeks both in Vienna and Prague.

Mozart ponders again. Then he speaks.

M: One thing that I really like in this movie is the depiction about me. (coughing slightly) I think I spent my life as a musician like the one depicted in the movie. Many people stated that I was gleeful most of the time, wandering with others in delight and joy. The movie also depicted my dress codes very well. I really like bright brown suit with a white scarf. Ah-Chooh (sneezing) I enjoyed the movie very much. It has been an enjoyable time, my dear. Thank you. Now I feel much happier than before.

Me: It’s my pleasure. I hope that you can feel happiness and cure your illness.

The candle light still shined brightly. Suddenly the light permeated into the immensely dark room. Everything brightened. I slightly noticed that Amadeus Mozart was smiling at me.

I woke up.



The dinner ended.

Sunday, September 4, 2011

After 3 days … “Someone” died


Requiem


Twinkle Twinkle Little Star Variation



Pondering back and forth, I could not decide on whom I should go with for lunch… I wanted a person who was special, but under difficult situation. I wanted one of the most creative figures in history who substantially affected the modern society. I wanted to grasp the unknown character of the figure: a character so unknown that most people would be surprised at. Considering, pondering, and “Thinking” for several days, I finally chose Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart.

O. Basic

Wolfgang Mozart is one of the most famous composers in classical music. He is also known as the genius of music. At the age of three, he was able to play several notes on the Klavier, the prior form of pianoforte. At the age of five, he composed his first musical piece. He subsequently composed several variations, sonatas, dance songs, and ceremonial pieces. He held concerts with his family in Austria, France, and Prussia. He composed his major works from 1786 to 1791. He composed more than 600 musical pieces in his life. Although he died early, his pieces are commented by critics as one of the most genuine and beautiful classical pieces in history. His famous pieces include "Symphony no.41", "Requiem", "Magic Flute", and "The Marriage of Figaro".

I. Who did I meet?

I would like to have lunch with Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, one of the greatest musicians in history.

II. Why did I want to meet him?

There are two major reasons why I wanted to have lunch with Wolfgang Mozart.

First of all, I wanted to figure out the character and personality of the greatest musician in history. Through the dialogue, I wanted to not only feel sympathy with Mozart who was in harsh circumstances but also observe the true personality and devotion Mozart had in music. Through the dialogue, I will try to grasp what Mozart wanted to achieve, what Mozart regretted, and what Mozart felt proud of himself in his life. I also want to figure out the source of inspiration for him to compose such myriads of classical pieces.

Moreover, I wanted to deduce the characteristic of classical music at that time by having conversation with Mozart. The composer reflected social changes by changing his style of music continuously. The French revolution, the industrial revolution, the decline of the Austrian Empire: all these factors led Mozart to change his unique techniques found in concertos and operas. I also wanted to hear the style of music prevalent just after the French Revolution by listening to explanations about Requiem, one of the masterpieces in history.

II.1. Why did I visit him in Vienna?

I wanted to check out whether Mozart was well or not. I was concerned that I might not be able to meet the great composer again. So I walked straight ahead to his house in Alsergrund, Austria.

III. When did I visit him?

I met him precisely on December 2nd, 1791 at one ‘o clock in the afternoon. This date was exactly three days before Mozart deceased. (Mozart deceased on December 5th) By meeting him at this moment, I wanted to observe the true characteristic of the great composer as well as the intense situation he was suffering from. Many people say that the true voice of a character is shown when he is under intense situation. Also, Mozart might have predicted that he would soon die; he would be much likely to tell his own thoughts to other person so that he can relieve pressure he received from past experiences. Thus, I might be able to grasp the genuine thoughts of the great musician by having a conversation with him when he is intensely ill.

IV. How did I get back time?

The setting: I accidentally went back time from December 2nd, 2011 to December 2nd, 1791. A time machine was invented and I was chosen by a group of scientists who wanted to find out whether the time machine worked properly. (The setting is extremely unrealistic..;;)

V. Where did I meet him?

I would like to visit his house, which is located in the suburb of Alsergrund, Austria. Alsergrund is currently the ninth district of Vienna, Austria. In late 18th century, Alsergrund was not one of the parts of Vienna; rather, the place was a local suburb close to the city. Since Mozart was extremely ill at that time, I will personally visit his house and have lunch with him. Maybe he would be lying in bed, enduring painful moments during the meeting. I would like to set the depressing but cheerful tone throughout the dialogue. Although he was facing harsh situations, Mozart was usually hopeful that he would rise up again.

VI. What I asked to him?

I wanted to ask Mozart three basic things. (actually I will create several specific questions based on these basic questions.)

The first question: “Why are you keep playing, composing, and even enjoying music even though you are under severe financial situation?” Mozart suffered from extreme financial difficulty. Yes, he succeeded in his earlier years when he composed several piano sonatas and violin sonatas. His economic life was also improving slightly in 1791, a year he deceased because of extreme illness. Still, he was suffering from extreme poverty because of political turmoil in France and Austria. I wanted to grasp the change in his attitude toward music. When he was successful, he might have felt passion toward music. Now in abject situation, he might have changed his attitude toward music. Maybe Mozart might ask me counter question, like this: Do you have devotion in playing music? I know that the standard of devotion in music is different between Mozart and me. However, I would like to answer to that question: Yes! I believe I have devotion toward music, especially on playing the piano.

The second question: “Can you describe about Requiem?” Requiem had been composed since 1791. However, the piece was incomplete because Mozart deceased before he ended the first act. I wanted to know these features: What feeling he wanted to convey in his masterpiece Requiem? What aspects of Requiem will he talk to me? (There is a tale that Mozart told about Requiem only to his student Sussmayr, but this tale also lacks possibility.) I wanted to imagine how Mozart would have completed Requiem based on techniques he used on other pieces such as operas, piano sonatas, and concertos. Unfortunately, Mozart might not give any answer to my question. He often did not talk or unleash anything about his new creations. He might give somewhat rude comments such as “How dare you ask that question!”

The third question: “Where do you gain inspiration from when you compose music?” Mozart’s composition is at once beautiful and somewhat fragile. Little sadness and disappointment flows beneath the beautiful melodies and harmonies. I wanted to ask Mozart what was the source of such hidden messages behind beautiful masterpieces. (Especially the piece “Oh, I give this piece to my mother”, also known as “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star”.) I also wanted to ask how he feels when he creates several masterpieces. He might feel happiness from his grandiose feats. He might feel loneliness because of isolation from society.

The last question: “Would you like to look at the future?” I wanted to contrast the situation in 1790 and 2011. Maybe Mozart will have great interest and curiosity about his future. Although he will figure out that he will die soon, he will feel happiness that all of his musical pieces are universal and prevalent in modern society. I will show him the scene of concert through video clips from my i-phone (the great composer might have much more curiosity on the i-phone rather than on his future) and explain him about the prevalence of classical music in modern society. I am sure that Mozart will ask so many questions about modern society, about the development of classical music. I would like to give Mozart happiness and amazement before he closes his eyes forever.


** I was not sure in deciding when I should meet Mozart.